Embracing Resistance
Luke 15:11-32
Then Jesus said, ‘There was a man who had two sons. The younger of them said to his father, “Father, give me the share of the property that will belong to me.” So he divided his property between them. A few days later the younger son gathered all he had and travelled to a distant country, and there he squandered his property in dissolute living. When he had spent everything, a severe famine took place throughout that country, and he began to be in need. So he went and hired himself out to one of the citizens of that country, who sent him to his fields to feed the pigs. He would gladly have filled himself with* the pods that the pigs were eating; and no one gave him anything. But when he came to himself he said, “How many of my father’s hired hands have bread enough and to spare, but here I am dying of hunger! I will get up and go to my father, and I will say to him, ‘Father, I have sinned against heaven and before you; I am no longer worthy to be called your son; treat me like one of your hired hands.’ ” So he set off and went to his father. But while he was still far off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion; he ran and put his arms around him and kissed him. Then the son said to him, “Father, I have sinned against heaven and before you; I am no longer worthy to be called your son.” But the father said to his slaves, “Quickly, bring out a robe—the best one—and put it on him; put a ring on his finger and sandals on his feet. And get the fatted calf and kill it, and let us eat and celebrate; for this son of mine was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found!” And they began to celebrate.
‘Now his elder son was in the field; and when he came and approached the house, he heard music and dancing. He called one of the slaves and asked what was going on. He replied, “Your brother has come, and your father has killed the fatted calf, because he has got him back safe and sound.” Then he became angry and refused to go in. His father came out and began to plead with him. But he answered his father, “Listen! For all these years I have been working like a slave for you, and I have never disobeyed your command; yet you have never given me even a young goat so that I might celebrate with my friends. But when this son of yours came back, who has devoured your property with prostitutes, you killed the fatted calf for him!” Then the father* said to him, “Son, you are always with me, and all that is mine is yours. But we had to celebrate and rejoice, because this brother of yours was dead and has come to life; he was lost and has been found.” ’
I wish for our reflection time today we could gather in a circle for story time. Not kindergarten story time where we’re sitting criss-cross-applesauce on the carpet for a quick picture book. No, I want the story time that comes later in elementary school when a teacher reads a chapter a day after lunch while our brains and bodies are moving slowly. Letting the words fill the space between each desk and leading us through a story piece by piece. The book? Well, you may have guessed it from our scripture passage for today: The Return of the Prodigal Son by Henri Nouwen.
Nouwen takes the reader through the perspective of each of the three characters: the younger son, the elder son, and the father. As he guides us through these three perspectives, it’s easy to see how we too embody the thoughts, emotions, and actions of the characters. We all have pieces of the three protagonists within us, and each can teach us something about ourselves and about God.
If we were doing a Bible study on this passage together, I might ask: Who do you identify most strongly with? Who do you resist? And then I’d want to push on that resistance—because that’s where the work is.
Perhaps you resist the younger son? No, it can’t be you who has taken the easy way out, squandered opportunities and resources, and ended up desolate. It can’t be you who is seeking to fill a hole within yourself with wealth, power, and prestige? Or could it?
Maybe it’s the elder son? Yes, you may be like him in staying close to the Father and doing all that is commanded. But you don’t share his resentment when he welcomes the prodigal back. You don’t seek to earn your way into the Father’s love by checking off all the boxes of shoulds and supposed-tos. No, not you.
And what about the Father? This is who Nouwen resisted most.
He says, “But what of the father? Why pay so much attention to the sons when it is the father who is in the center and when it is the father with whom I am to identify? Do I want to be not just the one who is being forgiven, but also the one who forgives; not just the one who is being welcomed home, but also the one who welcomes home; not just the one who receives compassion, but the one who offers it as well?”
Where is your resistance? If I’m honest with you, mine comes with the younger son. I can easily find myself in the rule-following resentment of the elder son, and I strive to embody the gifts of the father, however imperfectly. But if I’m honest with myself and with you, I can see all the ways that I have sought fulfillment from the world rather than God. I have run, however stealthily, away from the giver of all good gifts. I have been ashamed to hit rock bottom and return, seeing forgiveness I do not deserve. As Nouwen says, “The farther I run away from the place where God dwells, the less I am able to hear the voice that calls me the Beloved, and the less I hear that voice, the more entangled I become in the manipulations and power games of the world.”
How do we embrace our resistance, and what can God’s unfailing love bring us to guide us through that resistance?
If I embrace the squandering and unfruitful seeking of the younger son, I give myself grace to be loved right where I am.
If I embrace the resentment and rigidness of the elder son, I find that the love I am so desperate to earn is freely given.
If I embrace that I am not worthy to give love and forgiveness and grace like the father, I discover those qualities of mercy already living within me.
Friends, it is hard to be present in our world today. It is hard to show up day after day, week after week, seeking to do justice, love mercy, and walk humbly. And yet we wake up each day, put one foot in front of the other, show up in our messiness and grace, and share the transforming love of God wherever it’s possible.
But do not neglect yourself in the midst of showing up. Recognize the grace that you need for each day. Allow yourself to be loved completely. And only then, can you share God’s gifts of compassion, forgiveness, and homecoming. Amen.
prayer
“Drive Me Deep to Face Myself”
Lord, grant me your peace,
for I have made peace
with what does not give peace,
and I am afraid.
Drive me deep, now,
to face myself so I may see
that what I truly need to fear is
my capacity to deceive and willingness to be deceived,
my loving of things and using of people
my struggle for power and shrinking of soul,
my addiction to comfort and sedation of conscience,
my readiness to criticize and reluctance to create,
my clamor for privilege and silence at injustice,
my seeking for security and forsaking the kingdom.
Lord, grant me your peace.
Instill in me such fear of you
as will begin to make me wise,
and such quiet courage
as will enable me to begin to make
hope visible,
forgiving delightful,
loving contagious,
faith liberating,
peace-making joyful
and myself open and present to other people
and your kingdom.
Amen.
—Ted Lodor, Guerrillas of Grace
Daily Lenten meditations each have a companion morning prayer video offered by the same clergy. View the YouTube playlist to find this meditation’s companion video, or to watch others.